Learn to manage client relationships right from the start

I started my advertising business with a selling mentality. I was a go-getter. I literally hunted for business from clients. It is how you start when you have no business track record because you’re looking for clients, quality clients, to name on your profile. It increases confidence in you for any prospect, they say.

I didn’t even dream of the concept of being sought after. I was so conditioned as the seeker that being sought after didn’t occur to me.

Back in 2002, selling was about making tonnes of calls, sending out tonnes of introduction letters and proposals and following up, endlessly.

You know how that follow-up game can drag on especially when you still don’t know you’re the one who should put a lid on it at some point and if you know that, you’re not sure what point that is. I call this the joy of being the new kid on the entrepreneurial block.

I was the tea girl, office cleaner, sales representative, marketing executive, account manager or whatever name we now use for the hardworking people who actually bring in the business. I was the clerk, accountant, CFO, marketing director and CEO all at the same time.

The other roles didn’t exist and when their need arose, I filled in too. My plate was so full of things I had to chase all of the time. I ran around Nairobi like a headless chicken.

It was such hard work that I couldn’t believe it when I realised that there were entrepreneurs who had it the other way round. Clients, and everyone else around their businesses, were chasing them. Wow. How refreshing.

I had no previous knowledge that getting a client account meant the beginning of a long winding road with steep cliffs on either side. Getting the client was the easy part, actually. Keeping his or her account was another affair and let’s not even go into staying sane while dealing with the client. It’s a wonder I still have some hair on my head.

I ended up with a couple of customers taking on the role of driving the relationship. Let’s just say that those relationships weren’t my best and the going was less than good.

I didn’t understand then what I now teach as a coach — that the law of attraction is at work and its magnetic force is present in all my undertakings. I didn’t know that I get back what I give.

As a result, I expected clients to take care of aspects of their project while I would take care of mine and everything would go smoothly.

Now that would seem like a fair expectation but oops! I neglected to mention it to the customers and when things didn’t go right, the blame-game wasn’t exactly an exercise I wanted to participate in.

I got into trouble relating to my clients because I didn’t lay down my expectations. Oh, I knew them; I just neglected to mention, articulate and document them with the customer.

There was a vacuum in the roles we had towards the success of our work together and so the universe filled it with anything — in this case financially and relationally expensive blame games.

Being on the begging end of those relationships, I would end up acquiescing to customers, which meant a loss in one way or another and a nagging feeling of being taken advantage of.

Soon I got tired of not being in control of the dynamics of my customer relationships and set my mind to keep the driver’s seat at all times.

I put together a list of everything that had gone wrong and a list of how I’d have preferred things to go. I ended up with rules of engagement that I quickly incorporated in my quotation and included in my sales conversations.

Things started to look up and they’ve never cast their eyes downward since.

If we don’t set the rules on how our relationships go, we attract unruly relationships. When that happens, the easy way is to blame the other party.

While that can work, there are relationships you do not want to lose even if you win the argument. The trick is, therefore, not to get to the blame point.

You want to manage the end from the start. When people understand this, they appreciate the guidance your structures provide. They begin to rely on you to chart how things go in any situation related to your trade or expertise and before too long, you realise that they seek you out more than you chasing after them. 

Then you can stop running around like a headless chicken and spend your time and energy getting even better at your trade.  

Don’t pay attention to those who don’t appreciate this; work on making your relationships smoother and sustainable.

Those who see value will stay on and work with you for even greater success. Those who move away do not deserve your expertise and experience anyway.
What are your rules of engagement?  

Ms Ruligirwa-Kamara is a Proctor Gallagher certified coach on personal & leadership development.
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