Heritage

My new social life leads to costly misadventure

DANDY

I woke up to find a strange woman asleep in my bed. Illustration/Joseph Barasa

My heart has just skipped a beat? Why have I woken up with a strange woman in my bed. How did I get here? How did this happen?

I got out of bed and went to the kitchen to take some cold juice as I tried to reconstruct what could have happened. I also looked out of the window to check if my car was still there. If my head was anything to go by then my car must be in a worse state.

I let out a sigh of relief when I saw it although the angle it was parked showed it must have been driven there by a novice. That is when little disjointed memories started coming back.

Ever since I got this job, my social life has changed dramatically. I receive between two to three invitations every day to some launch, cocktail or dinner.

Initially I had decided that the best thing to do was to pass them over to some marketing representative. Then my PA intervened and told me:“ Boss I do not like the fact that you keep declining invites. It is giving you and this company a bad name.”

I was shocked by her statement and I asked her to elaborate. She did not mince her words. “I had to grow my profile to be seen to matter in Nairobi and networking was vital for today’s business.”

I followed her advice and in the last two weeks, I have found myself at three cocktails. The experience was not too bad and I realised that I enjoyed flashing out my card and telling people what I do and how many people I supervise.

Last night was one of those. Some beverage company was launching a top-end alcoholic drink and invited me to the event. I was not going to pass up this chance mainly because I need to be seen drinking top dollar stuff. Besides, it was a Friday.

I was at the swanky hotel at 7 pm dishing out cards to anyone who came my way and trying to sound important. In all honesty, the event was well put together, the band and DJ were nice, the hostesses were brilliant and the drinks and food were flowing smoothly.

I recall a beautiful woman coming up to me and introducing herself as Tina. Even without the influence of alcohol Tina was a “hottie” and she had all the right curves in the most dangerous places.

I remember dancing with her much to the envy of those around me. I can also recall leaving the party at about midnight.

When I offered to drop her home, she said something about living with her aunt who would be upset about her returning late. I do not know what possessed me but I found myself inviting her back to my place .

I now panic as I continue to remember the night’s events. I return to the bedroom and notices that Tina is snoring rather loudly .

She does not look as cute as she did yesterday. I also notice that her clothes and mine are strewn all over the floor. To make matters worse, I see an empty box of condoms in the corner of the room. This is not looking good. I surely must have slept with this girl.

Just then my phone rings and it is Shiro on the line. She sounds anxious on the phone: “Sweetie, where have you been? I have been trying to call since 8am.”

Only then do I realise that it is midday so I give her some story about being fatigued and coming down with flu.

She however gushes on about how she was coming for training at the head office in the city on Monday.

“I was only told about it this morning and have been trying to get a flight,” she says. I cannot believe she is coming to Nairobi.

“I will be boarding as we speak, no need to pick me up, I will take a cab,” she adds.

Crisis and panic buttons hit me at once. I need to clean up this mess and most importantly, make Tina disappear although she seems to be sleeping like the dead.