Is quitting your job the best option after clash with manager?

I have had too many transfers to new work stations across this country and I think it is time to quit my job and pursue my own interests.

My manager claims I have been moved around because of good skills and empowerment of others but I don’t think this is sincere because other aspects of my life are suffering.
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We will start by examining your question closely because you and your manager seem to be working at cross purposes, and sadly you are now considering leaving your job.

It is perhaps easiest to start with the last sentence in your question, if only to illustrate the point of departure between you and your manager.

You state, “My manager claims I have been moved around because of good skills and empowerment of others but I don’t think this is sincere because other aspects of my life are suffering.” The first part of the sentence is a statement by your manager regarding your good skills.

He holds the view that on account of your good skills, you are the right person to empower others. The second part of the same sentence is about your life, and the suffering that arises from what your manager decides to do with your skills.

Understood this way, it would seem that you and your manager have failed to communicate with each other. He sees your skills, while you see your suffering!

This would seem to be a good time for you and your manager to have a candid discussion if only to see if there is a more effective way in which he can utilise your skills which he clearly values a great deal.

It is possible that it has not occurred to him that frequent transfers are in any way detrimental to you. This is your chance to sort things out once and for all.

A few scenarios will clarify this position. In a meeting called by you, it might be possible to explain to the manager that you have established a more cost effective way of managing the job that you do.

You could explain to him that over the past 18 months, you have travelled to all the stations in the county, you have trained enough people who can now take the roles of trainers in the regions.

In this new (now proposed) arrangement, the team leaders in the stations would assume the training and quality control roles that have in the past fallen under your job description.

Armed with the names and CVs of all the people you have trained, you might be able to persuade the manager that quarterly harmonisation meetings at the head office would serve two purposes.

The first, to give the team leaders a chance to “get a break from base station”, the second to give head office a chance to better understand the business by hearing all the team leaders present their business results under the same roof, at head office.

In conclusion of your discussion with the manager, you might be able to demonstrate areas of savings in costs, related to travel, training and other allowances.

All said, the manager is likely to be so impressed that he suggests a new role for you — that of group strategy based at head office. In this scenario, both of you are winners.

The manager gets to keep a person whose skills he clearly appreciates, and you get the chance to remain at head office in a role that does not involve too many transfers. A win-win scenario works best in a work environment.

A different scenario is one in which your personal life is suffering because of the frequent transfers from city to city.

If, for example, you are a wife and mother of three children aged 10, 12 and 13, frequent transfers are truly disruptive of family life, and it would be right for you to consider quitting your job. You would be within your rights to start wondering why you bother to work.

Indeed it would be prudent to ask questions regarding the effects of frequent transfers not only to yourself, but also your husband and children.

Do frequent transfers have a long term effect on any of these relationships, and what short and long term effects might such separations (if any) have on family life.

On the assumption that the firm has seen you move from Mombasa, Nairobi, Kisumu and Eldoret in the last three years, what is the price you now have to pay?

A few years ago, we saw a man who was drinking his life away. He was — like you — a brilliant performer working for a financial institution.

He was very well paid on account of his ability to meet and exceed all his targets. He had a rapidly growing loan book and with an excellent record of performing accounts.

When posted to any part of the country, he quickly trained a very effective team and all went well until it was time for the company to open in another part of the country.

He and his wife had agreed to have a matrimonial home in the station he worked in first. As the children grew, he became more successful financially, but became more distant from them because he was unable to be at home more than one weekend in a month — is this like you?

In time, the wife developed a very close relationship with the pastor and thought her husband a man of the devil. The children drifted to disorders of conduct and did badly at school.

When we saw him, alcohol was his main friend, although he also had a local girl who helped him around the house. They often slept together. His financial fortunes declined.

His success had been his undoing! This was a lose-lose scenario. In your case, it might be wise to leave the job to save yourself and the family if the manager refuses to see the real dangers.