- I’m also not drinking this month. It’s a dry January. I do this every year. I avoid alcohol and alcoholics.
- And to test my mettle, I go and sit in a bar and see if I will succumb to temptations. I like the pain of smelling whisky.
I’m writing this after a small row with a neighbour, so the hairs on my neck are still standing. A new neighbour moved in. Waif-looking and mysterious lady with red rings around her eyes. She has a dog. One of those fluffy ones that people match with their purses. To mean, an accessory. I’m a dog person, but a big dog person. If you are going to get a dog, get a dog. I want a dog with an ugly face. Something menacing. A dog that sighs and groans when it walks. A dog that you can hear digest its food. Anyway, this small fluffy dog pooped right outside my door. I think it was sending a message. Or marking its territory, I know not the way of these dogs.
Like a civilised citizen, I went to hers and brought that to her attention in a very friendly way. She said, ‘Oh, I’m so sorry, Kiki is trying to get his way around, this is all so new for him, I will sort it out.’ I said, ‘No, it’s cool, I understand, don’t worry about it too much, new spaces can be like that for new dogs.’
Then I went running the streets, when I came back at night not only was the poop still there but I almost stepped on it. So I knocked on her door again and we had a little conversation that was strained and passive-aggressive. The next day the poop was still there.
This is how my new year is starting, talking about dog poop. I’m excited to see what the rest of the year looks like.
I’m also not drinking this month. It’s a dry January. I do this every year. I avoid alcohol and alcoholics. And to test my mettle, I go and sit in a bar and see if I will succumb to temptations. I like the pain of smelling whisky. So far so good. I’m a man of great resolve. How is yours going?