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Secret to making your relationships healthy and strong

happy couple
A happy couple. FILE PHOTO | NMG 

Two long-time friends were staying in neighbouring homes along with their families. One family was the most loving family, they were an amazing couple, had disciplined children and had friends always coming home.

They made the most of their lives and were happy and hearty. On the other hand, the other couple had constant quarrels, no one ever visited them, and the school always sent complaints about their children’s behaviour with others. The fighting couple almost gave up and they wanted to go in for a divorce.

One day they decided that enough is enough and wanted to visit the friend’s home to inform them about their divorce. Of course, they wanted to use this as an excuse to complain about each other and how their differences and insensitivity led to divorce.

All through the way, they were feeling jealous about the nice atmosphere that flourished in the neighbouring family and the wife kept telling her husband, “He is your friend since childhood, look at him, their house is full of joy and happiness, nothing close to ours, where we can’t see each other eye to eye.”

The husband told her to learn something from his friend’s wife. And they argued. As they sat there on a busy morning, they started to watch how their day unfolded. The happy couple welcomed them and told them to wait as they were just finishing few errands. This couple started watching.

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The lady started wiping the floor in the room. Suddenly something distracted her, and she ran to the kitchen. At that time her husband rushed into the room. He did not notice the bucket of water, occasionally kicked it, so the water overflowed. Then his wife came back from the kitchen and said to him, “I’m sorry, honey, it’s my fault because I did not remove the bucket from the pass.” The husband said, “No, I ‘m sorry, honey, it’s my fault, because I did not notice it. I should have been careful because you always mop home at this time, I should have known this.”

The quarrelsome couple got up and started walking back home. The happy couple told them to wait as they were almost done with their errands. But this couple knew that they got their answers, so they thanked them and started walking back home. And both of them almost in one tone said, “You see, we always seek to be right, while each of them takes the blame on themselves, whether or not it is their mistake.” Saying so they started mending their life and started living happily ever after.

Focus on the problem, not the person: Solutions are easier when you shift the focus from the person to the problem. Great minds discuss problems, average minds discuss events and small minds discuss people. Differences do not divide people: Differences between people are healthy, they give us a better outlook. People are divided by a lack of awareness to recognise, accept and resolve the differences. Life is not a problem to be solved: When you look at life as a problem to be solved, you miss the experience of living it, peacefully and progressively.

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