Beware of sneaky post-surgery blues

I went for a surgery in India and have somehow recovered, but it seems my life will never be the same as I have to be assisted to do many things including house chores. I keep wondering how I am going to survive like this since it is already giving me quite some stress.

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For some reason, you have decided to keep the nature of the surgery in India a secret.

In the circumstances, it is impossible for us to be sure what could have gone wrong. You further complicate our position by simply if rather vaguely stating “and have somehow recovered.”

Our now rather difficult life is made almost impossible by the fact that we do not know whether you are male or female, and importantly how old you might be. Are you, for example, a new bride in your 20s or a grandmother in your 70s.

If a young woman for example, did you undergo a gynecological procedure to treat infertility or are you in your 50s undergoing knee replacement in part due to obesity. It would also be helpful to know why you went to India. Was it because the type of expertise required is not available in Kenya or was it “because you wanted more privacy”.

Many people go for treatment overseas simply because it is trendy to do so.

Another angle revealed by your question is that of when, and where things went wrong. Did you go for surgery because of some other yet to be diagnosed condition? Without intending to scare you or others going to surgery in India or anywhere else, it might be helpful for you to ponder a few facts.

Post operative depression is as real as it is common and mostly goes unrecognised by both patients and their surgeon. Many excellent surgeons are trained to do the technical aspects of surgery but often neglect to attend to the human being who has, for example the prostatic or uterine cancer.

For the surgeon, his job begins and ends with the careful removal of the growth, often forgetting that the anxiety and post operative pain often conspire to lead to depression.

A complicated situation is made worse by the fact that the cancer itself contributes to the causation of the depression. The news that one has cancer is often received with a measure of anxiety a fact that itself leads to depression in some cases.

So, did you go to India already depressed by pain, anxiety and the cancer itself. To what extent is your situation made worse by the financial strain caused by treatment abroad.

In addition to your being unable to do your “house chores”, what else are you unable to do? Are you for example, able to go out to work, play or engage in other social activities such as your local church or are you mostly in the house spending most of your time in your bedroom. How much help have you needed since India?

There is a great deal of evidence that when the primary care giver is a spouse or other close relative, their rates of depression go up.

Other feelings that your condition might be evoking in those taking care of you might include anger and resentment in part because you have brought their lives to a halt!

The dynamics at play post-surgery are, therefore, many and could adversely affect close relationships. This fact alone can lead to further depression on your part.

For two reasons, it is my view that there is a likelihood that you are suffering from post operative depression. The first is the fact that surgery especially heart, gastric bypass, brain and hip or knee replacement are associated with depression.

The second is the fact that you seem to have given up; “It seems my life will never be the same”. You also state that you are stressed.

These are common symptoms of depression and I would suggest that you ask the surgeon to refer you to a psychiatrist for evaluation. In the alternative you could find one near you and ask him to offer an opinion.