Personal Finance

How passing the buck locks us up in our own prisons

Take responsibility for your mistakes instead
Take responsibility for your mistakes instead of apportioning blame. FILE PHOTO | NMG 

“When a person takes responsibility for their life and the results they are obtaining, they cease to blame others as the cause of their results." --Val Van De Wall

We cannot change other people. Blame is, therefore, not only inappropriate but also totally unproductive. Blaming others causes a person to remain bound in a self-imposed prison. Refusal to accept responsibility for our actions and inactions is a total rejection of our uniqueness.

When we pass the buck, we hand over our power to others — the people we blame for our misfortunes or the unfortunate circumstances that we find ourselves in.

What happens thereafter is that we are no longer in control of our present and consequently, our future.

We then sit back hoping that good things happen but because we generally suffer from hangovers of past experiences, we expect undesirable things to pan out in our lives time and again. We even have a tagline for it: hoping for the best while preparing for the worst”


By refusing to own up to our hand in our misfortunes, we mentally imprison ourselves in the issue we refuse to take responsibility for.

Sadly, most are unaware of our self-imprisonment. The truth is that mental incarceration is often worse than physical imprisonment.

The torment is capable of destroying just about everything necessary for a meaningful and fulfilling life. I am referring to self-image, self-respect, successful personal, social and professional relationships not to mention a host of other aspects of our persons.

Mental torment can even cause a person's physical health to deteriorate.

Responsibility flings the prison door ajar permitting us to walk out into a life of freedom. If we find ourselves in such stifling mental torment, we have got to be of good service to ourselves by showing ourselves the way out. Unlike the case with prisons, escape from a mental prison is not only possible but is safe and highly encouraged. The key is also within us — personal responsibility.

Unfortunately, there are the masses of people who struggle through life day in and day out.

They struggle because they permit their minds to be dominated by the tendency to perennially blame other people, things and situations for their I’ll luck. If this is a description of your way of life, decide to let it go.

Clearly understand that regardless of how much authority others may have in your life, you are fully in control of what happens in your life. If your life is not a magnificent adventure of advancement from strength to strength, it is because you have made errors in it.

Those around you, however, close to you are not responsible for your life. You were created to grow to the highest peaks of what is possible for you. You do this by continuously growing by proactively taking responsibility for your actions and inactions, especially those that end up in mistakes.

Everyone errs in life. In some instances, most are not even aware of their mistakes. At some point, we have the opportunity to own up and embrace the learning in our unproductive actions and/or inactions.

This is the only sure process of developing our self-awareness. When we are conscious of our strengths and weaknesses, we are better equipped to reign ourselves in to avoid the vicious cycle of undesired situations in our lives. This is called freedom.