To dreams, add positive thinking

How much BS are you tolerating? So we are clear, BS is a Rwandese acronym that stands for bitter sweet. Oh c'mon, you're grown up enough and you've used the words many more times than the years you've been alive. Yep! I mean bull****. Your eyes aren't deceiving you. And it's in a regional newspaper.

Don't I know your kids might read this? Oh paleeease! They use the word many more times than they say the "Thank Yous", "pleases" and "excuse mes".

Relax. Pick your jaw off the floor and let's get to it.

It's alright if you haven't answered the question out loud. I take that to mean you're tolerating a whole truckload of it. Do you remember the eighties when everyone break-danced? I couldn't do it. Colonel Abrahams would be belting out; "Can't you see am so trapped... ". I must have looked very comical trying because everyone burst out laughing whenever I did. I soon stopped bothering with it. I was made to understand I was backward.

I finally came to Nairobi City in the early nineties. Most of the enlightened people in the estate spoke Sheng. They did it so fast, my head hurt every time I attempted to understand what they said. I was deemed even more backward.

And then I went to college and every single one of the popular girls spoke in terms of "wanna" and "gonna" while I went with my regular "want to" and "going to". We called them the "yets" girls. (I hope that's how it's written!).

My English teacher would have been proud of me but that was the last nail, I was an officially certified villager. This did and still rings true. I am a villager - born and bred.

There is nothing wrong with that except that I permitted it to mean I was inferior. And for the longest time, I let that meaning shape my decisions on who I spent time with.

What I said in public, how much I put myself forward whenever there was an opportunity to have my voice heard. I let that meaning bar me from sharing my input. I let it keep my ideas and capabilities as some of the best kept secrets. What a waste!

There are a few experiences worse than knowing you have a whole mine of gold to offer but feel tied to that same place. I imagine zero-grazed animals feel this way. Many smart, creative and hardworking individuals can relate to this.

I also know you are familiar with that disappointing feeling of continually failing to reach your goals, aspirations and potential. Resolution after resolution amounting to nothing.

You've stopped resolving because there’s no point. Most of us wake up wanting to be the best we can. Hard as we may try, there seems to be some very industrious guards commissioned by some unknown power to hold off our forward progress.

And they do an admirable job of keeping us whining in our stagnation.

What have you tolerated? That you're not qualified, you don't look the part, you don't "fit in", you're not of a certain breeding? Smile. Smile wider until your molars show! While these may be true statements of you at any given time, they mean nothing. They are the exterior of you.

The real you is created with all the intelligence you require woven into every cell of your being. It is yet to unfold. These statements do not define you. They only hold you back to the extent to which you let them. But that's not the BS. The BS is that you tolerate and allow them to dictate you.

We all want meaningful relationships, great health, immense wealth and serenity. Feel free to put those in any order of priority. We wanna ( I learned to use “wanna”!) positively transform our lives and enjoy greater levels of success in every endeavour.

We can do this in a flash. It's a simple decision on just how much we are willing to do to achieve our dreams. It's about how much we are capable of enduring on that journey, how much we are willing to let go of, to create the space in our lives to permit the greater achievements we desire to come in.

One fine day, I stopped tolerating what held me in shackles for years.

I love the way our Oscar-winning sister put it: "No matter where you're from, your dreams are valid".

What are your dreams?