BIKO INTERVIEW: High-flying aeronautical engineer’s imposter syndrome

But even more remarkable was that he was only 28 years old when he obtained his PhD at the 54th best university in the world; Bristol University, UK. That was 10 years ago. After the PhD, he was faced with a dilemma; stay in the UK and work or haul it back home.

He returned home and because he gets hot from numbers, he took the role of investment analyst at Centum Investment, then ran the Youth Fund as Chairman before getting into academia at Kenyatta University where he helped build up the Aeronautical and Engineering department for seven years.

Dr Mwongera also briefly ran the Institution of Engineers as CEO. He’s currently the National Director of Young Scientists Kenya.

Window or aisle seat?

Window. I like to look outside.

Do you remember the moment when you said, “I would like to give aeronautic engineering” a shot?

I do; it was during the Air Show. I was about 10 years old. My mom took me. I remember getting on the plane, and when we took off, something clicked. It was a magical moment. After that, I knew I wanted to be a pilot, but then my dad, who is an engineer, said “Why don’t you design planes instead?” It seemed apt because I like working with my hands. I love building stuff, you know, DIY [Do it yourself].

I’m one of those weird people who love to fix stuff. Aerospace engineering then became the target. I went to Bristol University, the home of the Concorde and Harrier jet, you know, legacy planes. I did my undergrad and then my PhD in aerospace. I was in the UK for nine years.

Tell me something interesting about an aero plane that most people don’t know.

Most people believe that when a helicopter is flying and the rotors stop turning, the thing will drop from the sky. That’s not true at all. They’re designed in such a way that if you lose all power, they can glide down at an angle. Of course, it won’t be a smooth one. [Laughs]

What drove you to do a PhD by 28?

I wanted to do something to the best level that anyone had done. I don’t know where that came from; I would need a therapist for that. [Laughs]. But I wanted to push to the very end.

When I chose to do a PhD in aerospace engineering, a lot of people told me it was a very strange thing to do. Sometimes I look back and wonder whether I made the right choice, but, I mean, look at where I am. I think I did.

It’s interesting to note that I surprise a lot of people when I tell them that a PhD is not necessary in life. You really need to be specific about why you want to do it but also have the passion for your why.

Also, having a PhD doesn’t mean that you are the smartest person in the room. I would have quit in the middle of it, many people did, but my parents had that conviction that you can’t quit education.

Like I said, my dad is very strong on education. If it wasn't for that, at some point, I would have dropped off. And I know if I dropped off, I would not be alone. A lot of people I was doing a PhD with dropped off to start other careers and so on. Dropping off is not as dirty a word as most people think. It's simply just reorganising your priorities.

So, if you were to go back in time, you would not do it again?

It’s a hard question because the choices I made got me here. If I could go back in time, who knows what life I would have then? My PhD was in drones. I was the only one in the world who had that knowledge.

I thought, should I plough this knowledge back into the UK economy? Why can’t I take it back to Kenya? So, it was like a light bulb moment that came from that experience. So, knowing what I know now, I don’t think I would change.

When you finished your PhD at 28, did you get to ask yourself the question; I’ve reached the apex, what do I do now?

Yes, it was a question I asked myself at some point. I mean, conventional wisdom is to get a job, get married, and so on but I think after spending so much time thinking of one thing, I struggled to think of other things.

That's where the thought of coming back to Kenya crystallised. I knew I wanted to come back to Kenya and help build it. I didn't know the specifics though.

So, when I came back, I started working at Centum as an investment analyst because I needed a starting point to restart my career.

That was interesting because part of it worked well with numbers. I mean, my wife can tell you if you put me in front of a computer, I can disappear for days. My job was to cut through the noise with numbers. Very interesting stuff. [Laughs]

So apart from building things, using your hands, and working with your hands, what are your other passions?

I love cycling. It's something I started when I was in university. I like being outside, I’m an outdoorsy person so I like the freedom that comes with that.

I still cycle but not as often as I would like to. I also love to cook, experiment, throw new things together in a pot, and see what comes out.

How many children do you have?

I have three. The eldest is five and the twins are four, all boys. Fatherhood is exciting and it’s been tiring for the past few years. Having twins is a completely different experience. I adore my children but raising them also comes with worry.

You have these three people who see you as everything: a role model, provider, protector, and mentor. It's daunting to be all those things for one person. [Chuckles] But overall, it’s rewarding. And exhausting. And fun. [Laughs]

What bits do you find challenging?

Knowing their future is in your hands, especially financially, because when you think about it, this person will depend on you until they leave the house at, what, 24? It makes you wonder if you have planned well enough to keep this going.

Sometimes I’m enjoying it, you know, teaching someone how to think, what morals to have, what things to do. But overall, being responsible for them is a big challenge.

I worry for them a lot but also have great faith in our family, especially my wife because I think parenting is a partnership.

What do you worry for yourself?

I’m 38, I worry if I’m a good provider, a good husband, a good mentor. I also worry about bigger things, like the morals of our society, and whether it [moral decay] will continue or shift.

I generally worry about the overpopulation problem because we keep on increasing, but the planet's resources are draining. I mean, what is to happen?

If you had an hour to talk about any topic that excites you, what would you talk about?

History. I’m a big fan of reading, all sorts of literature, all manner of topics. But history has been getting a lot of my attention because I find it interesting to look at what humanity has done in the past, especially with an open mind.

To study history with that unbiased view of some of the things that happened in the past and how they’re affecting us today is fascinating.

For instance, reading up on the history of the farmer’s associations in Kenya is incredibly interesting to me. I mean, it sounds a bit strange and doesn’t make for a good party conversation. [Chuckles]. I don’t get to read much nowadays, instead I tend to listen more to audiobooks.

Have you discovered anything about yourself lately that has surprised you?

Yes. I was an introvert in my younger years which had something to do with the research. Doing research forces, you to focus inward. You can go for a whole week without speaking to anyone.

But as I've gone through various stages in my life, especially where I am now, I've had to become more extroverted to the point that I'm effectively a salesperson, you know, that whole aspect of being able to pick up a conversation with anyone, have a chat, pitch ideas, or whatever. That in the past used to be very terrifying.

What’s your current struggle now at 38?

I’m struggling with the realisation that I’m passing or just passed that youth barrier, which is 35. I’m now considered middle-aged, a word that has a strong connotation.

It implies that there are certain things you should have sorted out…big investments…you should be doing corporate meetings globally. By now you should be a seasoned person and it feels a bit like imposter syndrome.

I’m at that stage where I’m asking myself; How do I now become like the other middle-aged people? And what is a middle-aged person supposed to look like? The impostor syndrome comes with questions like, will I make it past middle age? Will I be financially sound because some of the biggest things I am yet to do are still ahead of me, taking children to school and so on? Growing the family and being comfortable.

I am fearful of imposing a black tax on my children. Very, very fearful of that. I don't want to do that.

Most people I interviewed for this section are always afraid of embarrassing the word success about their achievements. Maybe because success feels like the end of a road, or lack of ambition, or hubris. What does success look like for you?

I guess the reason people fear it is that success is not a single measure. It's a continuous set of measures. It's continuously in different stages of your life.

Where I am right now, I feel like I'm successful. I'm hoping you won't print that one in a very arrogant way.

[Laughs] I'm successful because the family is doing well, and people are healthy. I have a job I like that also merges with my passions.

I’m doing well with my partner. So, I feel like success for now looks good. But if 20 years down the road I'm still doing the same thing, that would not be a success.

Even if it's yielding great results?

Yes. I don't think it is success. It could be an aspect of stagnation. Part of success is continuously evolving, and I say this personally.

When I was in academia, even though I moved to different roles, you know, I was still at the same organisation for a long time. And I didn't realise it, but I was settling into the ways of doing things, and the people you talk to.

When I moved from that to my next role outside of Kenyatta University, it was a big shock. Sitting in a role or an organisation for a very long can give you an illusion of success. You can think you're okay, but you're not. You're losing something.

If you had the innocence of a two-year-old, what would you do?

With or without responsibility?

Nice spin…without responsibility.

I would immediately pack a bag and travel. This is something I admired about people I met at university. Guys who would pack a bag and go, travel for a year. I think it has a romantic appeal, to go somewhere where no one is waiting for you. Where you only have to pay a bill for there, for that moment, then move elsewhere with a different promise and experience.

Where would you travel to first?

I would start with the South Mediterranean, just because so much of it is about human history. I would love to see some things I read about, the various structures still there.

What was going through people's minds as they went through their day? I would want to go to the Far East because of their culture. I would do the US for a little bit.

When was your most difficult moment in life?

That was when I was studying for my PhD. When people see someone with a doctorate, they think they are smart, but what they don't realise is that it's more a strength of will than anything.

There's not much of the safeguards we're used to. It’s just you, your mind and your determination. And for a long time, it was a very solitary experience. It affected me mentally. It was a very trying time.

Anything you want to say in closing? Anything at all. It can be a quote. It can be a verse.

We have a research festival next week (August 20-23) called the Kenya National Research Festival. At the festival, we have an exhibition called the National Science and Technology Exhibition. It’s at the Edge Convention Centre in South C.

It’s a unique one this year because we have two schools from Kakuma refugee camp participating. Can you imagine? We have a school from Rusinga Island participating. It’s going to be exciting; everybody should come.

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